We hear a lot about creative triumphs, and we see a lot of shiny pretty finished products, and I don’t know about you, but this can be really demoralizing when you’re in the creative trenches, trapped with your own anxious mind and messy projects. So I’ve added a new feature to this newsletter - a one-question interview with an author where I ask them what they suck at. I hope you find this exploration of failure and shittiness to be as helpful and illuminating as I do. First up in our series is the awesome and talented Stephanie Feldman, whose excellent new novel Saturnalia came out last fall.
And just a wee bit of rank self-promotion: I’ve been nominated for the Chicago Reader’s Best of 2022 in two categories - Best New Novel by a Chicagoan and Best Novelist (!!). If you have it in your heart to vote by February 15th, that would be just terrific. Here’s the link; you have to scroll down to the categories, though. (You don’t have to be a Chicagoan to vote!)
Five Things I’ve Liked Recently that You Might Also Like:
Everyone thinks Chicagoans love deep dish pizza, but I’m here to tell you we only eat it when someone’s visiting from out of town (nevertheless, if you insult deep dish, we will come for your first-born). Real Chicago pizza is something called tavern-style (or, even more fun — “party cut”), whose main features are a cracker-thin crust and slices cut into squares. The original idea was a pizza that everyone at the tavern could share after a few too many Old Styles. I think that’s true, anyway, I’m not a pizza historian. In any case, my favorite pizza joint just closed, so I’m trying to learn how to make the crust myself. I enlisted the assistance of my friend Andrew Huff, and our first attempt was FINE but not GREAT (not his fault, I made the dough!), so I’m still on the hunt for a good recipe. Chicagoans: Please share if you have one!
Have you read Oliver Burkeman’s book 4000 Weeks: Time Management for Mortals? It’s great, and despite the title, is really more about life and philosophy than time management hacks. I took a Zoom seminar with Burkeman and have decided to wholeheartedly embrace his philosophy to “be a C student” and “fail seasonally.” The idea is that you will never accomplish everything on your to-do list - it’s impossible! - and there’s something liberating about realizing your limitations. Realizing your limitations is the first step, I think, to accepting that you are mortal. And once you accept that, the question becomes… what’s most important to you, what can you kind of just be okay at, and what can you let slide? I’m completely bastardizing this summary, highly recommend his newsletter as a starting point.
Extremely late to the party here, but holy shit Severance! I gasped! Multiple times! No spoilers here, but I’m so enamored of how that show is unfolding; it’s doing exactly the kind of storytelling I aspire to - unexpected, goofy, weird, emotional. Another show I loved: Fleishman is in Trouble. Bit of a slow burn, but it does something else I love in visual storytelling — really playing with your expectations, and then holding up a mirror to make you look at yourself differently (Fleabag also does this incredibly well). I also just love to see Jewish life depicted in stories. Also… Jesus Christ, Claire Danes.
This cocoa powder. You cannot believe how expensive it is, or how giant the bag is that it comes in, but it is a cocoa powder GAME CHANGER. Seriously, fuck Hershey forever after this stuff.
Hey Stephanie Feldman, author of Saturnalia! What writing thing do you really struggle with (or even just SUCK at)? What have you learned from that struggle?
STEPHANIE: My first novel came out in 2014, and I really struggled with the second. I tried a few different stories, and kept receiving feedback that the pace was too slow, the stakes weren't clear, the hook wasn't compelling enough. By the time I started Saturnalia, I was determined to grab the reader by the throat and not let go. I had been studying story structure for years by then--it's so rarely taught or addressed in literary circles, and I want my students to understand the fundamentals of narrative. So I had the tools. I just had to get out of my own way.
Saturnalia is about gender and power, climate catastrophe, class and social hierarchies, and trauma and recovery. But you can't write "about" ideas. Ideas come from the story. I started simple: My main character, Nina, agrees to steal a hidden box during the Saturn Club's solstice masquerade party. That simple, concrete goal created a strong foundation for the plot--which grows wilder, and thematically complex, as the novel goes on.
I learned a lot about story from writing Saturnalia, but I still struggle to get out of my own way. My internal editor is as obnoxious and noisy as ever. I can't open my documents these days without being overwhelmed by doubts. It helps to turn on music, or go to a coffee shop, and sometimes I do give myself permission to take a break if my head's just not in the right place. I also create "easy" goals: just 100 words, just 15 minutes... That can take the pressure off and help me get started. I'm not sure if I'll ever defeat that saboteur-voice in my head, but I don't let it chase me away from the work, so I guess that's a kind of victory. (Maybe the only victory there is.)
Thank you for being my guinea pig, Stephanie! (Go get Saturnalia at your favorite bookstore!)
And finally…
Bonus Lewd Animal Fact:
I’m realizing a lot of these facts are penis-focused. It’s so easy to find facts about weird animal penises… but we hardly ever hear about their vaginal counterparts, which are JUST as worthy and weird.
So today is about pig cervixes. The pig cervix is 6 to 8 inches long. It is a spiral. It has a locking mechanism at its entrance that docks the corkscrew-shaped pig penis, so that it can screw into the cervix.
Pigs: Taking the term “screwing” extremely literally.
Thanks for reading! If you like the cut of my jib, won’t you share it? I also have a novel I’d love to sell you!